I wasn’t able to complete the last one but based on the
feedback I saw on other people’s posts I was able to capture the idea of mine
well. I got to the point and said why people really need this. However, I believe this video could be greatly improved by speaking louder and more clearly. I have trouble with articulating my thoughts so I need to work on that. Other than that though I believe my points were there, I just need to better fine tune the delivery.
Hey Mary, great job on the video. I think you had excellent content, but like you said, your delivery wasn’t as great as you were hoping for. I think your idea is awesome, but as you said, you did come off quit and uninterested. I do the same thing, don’t worry about it, it just takes practice. Keep up the good work, I look forward to seeing your next elevator pitch!
ReplyDeleteHey Mary! I understand it was hard for me to deliver as well, especially since I hadn't done the first elevator pitch. As we get more used to being in front of the camera, it will become more natural for us. Next time, try to find a way to prop the camera up higher so that you can get a better angle. Maybe try stacking it on top of some books.
ReplyDeleteHey Mary,
ReplyDeleteYour camera placement could use some work, as well as your hook. I was not drawn in even though this is an issue that affects me. Next time assert yourself and your idea. It's a good one, but a bad first impression is everything. Next time try starting with something to grab the audience as soon as possible. I recorded my video handheld, maybe that would work for you as well.
Mary, this is a great foundation for your elevator pitch because technically it was your first one. Try and fix the camera placement next time, and slow down a bit! You kind of sound like you were just reading, so rehearse it and just be you :) It is a great idea, and overall a really good pitch. Keep up the good work.
ReplyDelete